It's Time Once Again for the Salute to the NFL's Shittiest Teams!!

That's right, bitches, it be Toilet Bowl time!!

As you'll recall, for the past few years while others do that fantasy stuff and try to pick the best players out there, we here at BlanketyBlog strive to find the polar opposite. That's why the creation originally known as the Doughnut Derby started in 2006. Every week I showcased the NFL teams sporting 0-for-whatever records, and the winner (er, loser?) was the last team to win a game.

The first Derby was "won" by the Oakland Raiders, who by Week Five were the only winless team.

In 2007, the contest regenerated into the BlanketyBlog Toilet Bowl, where the winless teams were referred to as Turd Teams, and a win would get them Plunged. The last team floating were the Miami Dolphins who went almost the whole damn season until they upset Baltimore.

So now we come to the First Week of Toilet Bowl 2008, and as per usual, we have sixteen Turds to start off with, and heeeeeere they are!:

• The Washington Redskins, who lost to the Giants on Opening Night
• The San Francisco 49ers, who lost to the Cardinals(!)
• The Seattle Seahawks, who got a rude welcome from the Bills
• The St. Louis Rams, who didn't bother showing up against the Eagles
• The Detroit Lions, who lost to the new-look Falcons
• The Minnesota Vikings, by five to the new-look Packers
• The Tampa Bay Buccaneers, in a squeaker against the Saints
• The Miami Dolphins (no surprise there), who lost to the new and Favre-improved Jets
• The Kansas City Chiefs (GREAT GOOGLY MOOGLY!!) against the Patriots, although in the long run the Patriots suffered the bigger loss when Tom Brady went down
• The Oakland Raiders, once again the bitches of my Broncos (yaaaay!)
• The San Diego Chargers, upset by the Panthers
• The Cincinnati Bengals, with their new WR Chad StupidAssDumbFucker who did jack crap against the Ravens
• The Cleveland Browns, in a laugher to the Cowboys
• The Houston Texans (once again, no surprise) to the Steelers
• The shocker Turd, the Indianapolis Colts, to the fucking Bears of all teams!
• The Jacksonville Jaguars, against the Titans

Looking at the teams, BlanketyBlog forecasts that the Miami Dolphins will defend their Toilet Bowl crown. Let's see how this week's matchups stack up:

• Bears vs. Panthers. Da Bears suck. Panthers.
• Titans vs. Bengals. Seeing as how the Vince Young situation has evolved, the Titans may be affected by poor play as a results. Bengals.
• Packers vs. Lions. Hah. Hah hah freakin' hah. Packers.
• Bills vs. Jaguars. The Bills could be a surprise team, but then again they say that about the Bills every year. Jaguars.
• Raiders vs. Chiefs. GREAT GOOGLY MOOGLY, an automatic Plunge! I say it'll be the Chefs.
• Colts vs. Vikings. Shit, another Plunge! I cannot see Peyton Manning start the year 0-2. Colts.
• Giants vs. Rams. Eli's comin'! Giants.
• Saints vs. Redskins. Hmmm....you can take yer pick on this one.
• 49ers vs. Seahawks. I'll be damned, another guaranteed Plunge. 49ers in an upset.
• Falcons vs. Buccaneers. Meh. Falcons.
• Dolphins vs. Cardinals. Will I pick the Dolphins? Computer says "no!" Cards.
• Ravens vs. Texans. No friggin' way. Take yer pick.
• Chargers vs. Broncos. Duh, Broncos.
• Patriots vs. Jets. Ooooooooh. Jets in a major upset.
• OH FUCK ME, NOT THAT FAITH HILL SONG AGAIN!! Steelers vs. Browns. This'll be one-sided, in favor of the Steelers.
• AND HANK WILLIAMS JR. ONCE AGAIN SINKS FURTHER INTO RUINS FOR ANOTHER SEASON. OTOH, TOP GEAR IS ON SO I WON'T BE LACKING ANYTHING TO WATCH: Cowboys vs. Eagles. I could give a shit. Take yer pick.